Time Bush Is Removed From The Endangered Species List

As posted previously, this pox on our country's administrative history (aka: George W. Bush, Jr.) just won't go away quietly. Hasn't he already "gotten" the loud, clear and distinct message that the majority of voters in this country think he royally effed up these past eight years and the best thing he could do for the entire country (and Bush-supporters, too) is to at this point just keep as low a profile as possible (like he did during the campaign which didn't do squat for McCain anyway), say nothing, do nothing...and get the hell out of that big white building?

Yet, like some vengeful little kid who feels he's been unduly punished or rejected by his classmates because he wanted all the bats, balls and ownership of the field, he's pulling a "I'll show them...heh, heh, heh" . Read about Bush's last hurrah before slinking off into the Texas sunset.

For a listing of this sociopathic, paranoiac's last-ditch efforts to push through enough deleterious legislation - to the human, animal and environmental arena - check out ProPublica. Make sure to click on all the headings in the left-hand side bar for complete descriptions of each "Midnight Regulation" as they're called.

Just when you thought you knew how much disdain this man holds for the welfare of this country, he goes and pulls another pile of Bushshit out of his 10-gallon empty hat.

One More Bush Disaster For The Road

Some people just don't know when they've overstayed their welcome. Especially when you consider that according to the majority of voting voices November 4th, Mercifully-Soon-To-Be-Former-President Bush wasn't welcome in the first place.

In yet another one of his last-ditch efforts to hurriedly push through even more invasive and damaging legislation towards our natural resources MSTBFP-Bush and The U.S. Fish & Wildlife are seeking to once again overturn a ruling to delist delist the gray wolves of The Rocky Mountains from the endangered species' list.

The fact that mining companies in the area have their own agenda of expansion into those sensitive areas might have something to do with MSTBFP-Bush's urgency. (By the way, anyone who's naive enough to think the U.S. Fish & Wildlife's mission is to protect our natural resources and is uninfluenced by special interest groups and politics, probably also pushed the lever for McCain this November and laments Palin's retreat to the Alaskan tundras. You betcha.)

As if his legacy as this country's worst environmental president wasn't bad enough. His almost pathologically-intentional disdain for our country's natural resources, environment and threatened wildlife populations will forever be written in history books as well as the hearts & minds of concerned Americans. At this point, we can only hope and work with the new Obama administration to not only enact more protective legislation, but to overturn and undo the damage caused by MSTBFP-Bush.

Even the most lame sociologist, therapist or penny-ante,talk-show pseudo-shrink would be fair and accurate interpreting this man's last-minute actions as nothing short of vengeful. Or revengeful. Or borderline sociopathic in my humble, lay opinion. The urgency of these and many other down-to-the-wire measures seem to indicate his intentions to weigh down the new administration with so much legislation that most definitely will need to be overturned, it will bog down in Congress or languish on the new president's desk at the dictates of other pressing priorities, like the economy and Iraq.

Bush will be gone - soon. But the stench left in his wake will fill the air across our land and pervade foreign countries long after his physical presence is finally beyond the confines of the Oval Office. It would almost be worth any ozone layer holes, which may very well have been exacerbated during his eight-year debacle in the White House, if his malodorous legacy could escape through one and into outer space. If nothing keeps the "alien invaders" away, that surely will.

I will never be so glad to see The White House door hit someone in the ass come January 20, 2009. With the possible exception of Nixon.

HAIL TO THE NEW CHIEF!!!

God Bless America. God Bless President Obama, and God Bless the People of This Country Who Made It Possible!
I have never been so proud and unbelievably filled with joy that this has happened in my lifetime.

Election Hopes

Normally, whenever I get one of those automated or as they're referred to now, RoboCalls, or even if it's from a live person soliciting whatever, I'll either hang up, say no thank you or tell them to call back later. Much later.

However, this afternoon I received a call from a real live person at my county's Democratic headquarters asking first that I vote on November 4th and secondly (in his words) "We'd like to encourage you to vote for Barrack Obama"

I smiled thinking that this was one of the few types of calls like this that I was more than glad to respond, and I did.

"Thanks for all the work you all are doing and, believe me when I tell you that you don't have to encourage me one bit to vote for Mr. Obama!"

I'm watching MSNBC at the moment and Nancy Pfotenhauer (that's a mouthful), who's Chief of McCain's Campaign is being interviewed. The sounds off if that's any indication of what I think of both her and her candidate.

My hope is that their 'sounds' will be permanently off after November 4th.

At Least McCain & Obama Can Agree On Darfur

I pray to God that whoever assumes the mantle of Presidency of this country, they keep their word.

Bush Says "Okay" To Rocket Fuel In Drinking Water

Adding yet another stone to his 'grave' legacy, The-Still-President aided by pressure from the sabre rattlers at the Pentagon, have pressured the already impotent EPA to back off on setting limits for percholate in drinking water, ground water & wells.

From THE WASHINGTON POST STORY here is a quote:
"Some perchlorate occurs naturally, but most perchlorate contamination in U.S. drinking water stems from improper disposal by rocket test sites, military bases and chemical plants. A nationwide cleanup could cost hundreds of millions, if not billions, of dollars, and several defense contractors have threatened to sue the Defense Department to help pay for it if one is required."

This "rocket-fuel-laced percholate" occurs predominantly in states like California and the Southwest where much early aeronautic experiments were conducted. But it is pervasive throughout the country in varying degrees. It's those 'degrees' which the EPA sought to cap limits for drinking water.

But, despite overwhelming scientific and medical evidence to the contrary The-Still-President in his infinite wisdom (?) agreed with the Pentagon - which would have to compensate the Defense Department's contractors for cleanups as well as take ethical (?) responsibility for the egregious amounts of percholate in our drinking water - and strong armed the EPA into concessions favoring the Administration and the Pentagon.

Yessiree! "Country First" as usual. Which really means: The first one to get screwed is the Country.

So Just Who Won That Veep Debate?

Well, it depends on whose criteria was followed.

Apparently , Biden's and Palin's criteria were different. Afterall, she stated at the outcome that she was only going to answer the questions SHE wanted to. So right there, her guidelines were drawn a bit crooked.

Biden's criteria was to enunciate and support the Obama ticket and administration. His intelligence, capability and experience was never in question, nor an issue predicated on his success in this debate. So I'd say he not only met the challenge and qualified the criteria, but, overall...won the debate.

However, because the expectation level of Palin's performance was so low to begin with, her criteria to "win" the debate wasn't just to prove how qualified, capable, knowledgeable or smart she was. No.

All she had to do was prove just how stupid she WASN'T. And on that point, you betcha, by golly, at least that lil *wink wink* maverick managed to score at least one Not-So-Stupid goal in the soccer net. Of course, one goal does not a full game make. One puck rattling around in an empty net means there's still a lot of loose pucks in play, on the rink and in the empty locker room of her Tina Fey-doppelganger head. But, at least her Republican handlers could breathe a bit easier for a few moments...until the latest polls came out and it was time to strap on the oxygen tanks once again. Still, ya gotta give the good ole boys (and gals) credit. It was sure some awfully long, torturous 90 minutes, by golly, for those poor ex-Bushies to hold their breath. You betcha.

*Stu-pi-di-ty*: Constant Repetition Of The Same Thing In The Same Fashion & Expecting Different Results Each Time

I have had an amazing epiphany these couple of months: I am tired of talking to or communicating with idiots. I have - Tah-Dah! - finally realized the futility of it all. For someone who would rather relish a good conversation, I have resigned myself to (for as long as I can hold out) turning the other "silent cheek", so to speak.

Perhaps some of this was exacerbated by the current political debacle. I say "debacle" because in my heart of hearts I fear the overwhelming stupidity of so many of the American people will out. The lemming sheeple will in lock-step cast their votes for the same-o-same-o and President McLame and Vice President Pinhead will reign this November. Too many people base their opinion and votes on unfounded, unsubstantiated and unopposed sound-bites from a talking head and don't bother using their own.

Perhaps it's the unbelievable watching-paint-dry boredom & futile waste of time engaged in alleged 'open-minded' conversations. Perhaps it's the underlying hostile or outright dumb-as-a-post idiocy of the persons who 'populate' some gatherings I've confronted lately. Oh, I'll still masochistically attempt to volley a few words or raise my hand amongst people who usually prefer to sit on theirs. But I'm earnestly trying to strengthen my focus to cease and desist wasting words on the illiterate or on the opinions on the narrow and closed-minded.

Maybe, if come November 4th a spark of intelligent life is seen flickering on our horizon, and my pathetically indomitable hope for intelligible conversation manages to surface from beneath the sea of stupidity in which so many slog....maybe I might join the fray more vocally once again. Maybe I might consider that watching that paint dry really is more boring and futile. Maybe. But right now, that wet paint has higher prospects of garnering my attention, time and effort.

....And The 2008 Rubber Dodo Award Goes To....

None other than the Governor of Alaska, Sarah "I-see-Russia-from-my-house" Palin.

The Center for Biological Diversity has awarded its Annual Rubber Dodo (after the extinct bird) to the republican vice presidential-candidate-in-hiding for outright falsifying statistics from the Alaska Bureau of Fish & Wildlife on the shrinking polar bear populations in Alaska. The Bureau has linked their decline to global warming and urged, in its report, to keep the polar bear on the endangered species list. All three issues which Gov. Palin disputes and, apparently, decided the only way to discredit those findings and substantiate her dispute was to falsify the statistics when reporting them to Washington. What? Not enough wolves to murder from the air?

When describing Mrs. Palin's stance on global warming, the executive director of The Center, Kieran Suckling, said:
"Governor Palin has waged a deceptive, dangerous, and costly battle against the polar bear. Her position on global warming is so extreme, she makes Dick Cheney look like an Al Gore devotee.”

She had actually filed a lawsuit with the Bush Administration utilizing falsified statistics as grounds for removing the bears from the endangered species' list. Lies and falsehoods to which she subsequently admitted and a lawsuit she summarily withdrew as well.

The following are some highlights from the article which can be read in full HERE

"Palin repeatedly has asserted that Alaska Department of Fish and Game scientists found fatal flaws in the sea ice models used by the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service to determine the polar bear is threatened. When challenged, Palin refused to release the alleged state review. Independent scientists eventually obtained a summary through the federal Freedom of Information Act, revealing that Palin had lied: The state mammalogists concurred with the Fish and Wildlife Service determination that Arctic sea ice is melting at an extraordinary rate and threatens the polar bear with extinction.

Somehow, I don't think that's the only Dodo Award Sarah will win before this perfect example of The Peter Principle (look it up) is banished back to the frozen Great White North. I'm sure someone could round up another one for her "interview" with CBS News anchor, Katie Couric...


***Shivvvvverrrr*** Makes me cringe every time I watch this. If it wasn't so scary, it'd be hysterical. In truth, it's just plain pathetic and sad. I almost feel sorry for her here. Almost. No. Not really.

Canadian Peat Bogs In Crisis

Despite the positive outlooks and press from some industry manufacturers of peat moss-based potting mixes and soil amendments, The Canadian Sphagnum Peat Moss Council has released updated warnings that the peat bogs of Canada are shrinking and not renewing as fast as anticipated.

Although peat bogs are renewable, even the most liberal minded of peat-product manufacturers and consumers will - and should - agree that it's an extremely slow renewal process. A slow rate which is exacerbated by both natural and man-made causes. *see: Global warming. It's because of that caveat, so many horticulturalists (both professional and lay) consider it non-renewable, and that may become a definite classification according to this cautionary press release issued by The Canadian Sphagnum Peat Moss Council in September, 2008. The innate slow renewal rate, combined with over harvesting and the aforementioned global warming implications, forebode an even more precarious future for the bogs and increased scarcity of peat moss.

Canada is, one of the largest suppliers of peat moss outside of The British Isles and Siberia. While peat is organic in nature, it adds little in the way of nutritional value to the soil. Shredded and half-decomposed leaves add more nutrients, improve soil conditions, retains moisture yet enhances drainage and makes for generally happier, fatter and more productive earthworms. Plus for many people, leaves are free and abundant, which certainly can't be said for peat moss considering the current (and possibly future) conditions for bogs such as the ones in Canada.

I still prefer minimal use of peat moss, however, in small quantities as part of my own potting soil formulation. Despite the consistent rise in peat moss prices, I've found combining it with compost, perlite and kelp meal is still more cost efficient than purchasing pre-mixed potting soil or seed-starting mix. But, like many other gardeners who rely upon peat moss for such applications, and for those people who do not have access to an abundance of leaves and/or compost, alternatives to peat moss must be sought. Right now - at least as far as a potting soil or seed-starting mixes are concerned Coconut-Fiber Coir is a very acceptable alternative. It is still more costly for those gardeners like myself who use either a great deal of potting soil or start a large number of seeds. But as more people purchase it and if peat moss prices predictably continue to rise (especially in light of this latest report out of Canada), the cost difference between alternatives and peat may be a wash.

Defenders Of Wildlife Desperately Need $100,000 To Air TV Ads Of Sarah Palin's Advocacy Of Aerial Wolf Slaughter

The Defenders of Wildlife, who today came out in support of Obama/Biden, needs $100,000 to air television ads on Sarah Palin's support, advocacy and participation in the inhumane, aerial wolf slaughter. It reveals to me Mrs. Palin's lack of compassion and a very frightening, blood lust nature.

This brutality - which in no way, shape or form could possibly pass as "hunting" - must be seen by more people than those on both sides of the political fence and, maybe more importantly, by those still straddling.

It must be seen by the people who turn their heads and hide their eyes when such subjects are even hinted at. These are the people who must have their nightly t.v. doses of reality programs interrupted with True Reality. Let this interrupt and jar their t.v. viewing with their children in the comfort of their living rooms and then have to explain to their kids why they want this woman to be our next Vice President. Or the next time they rent "Balto", let them envision and explain again to their kids how the animated wolf is any different from the real-life wolf being butchered from the air compliments of Mrs. Palin and the Good Ole Boys she claims to disavow.



In her recent Gibson inerview, when Palin was asked about gun possession, one of the words she used as justification was "ethical". As in: as long as guns are used ethically. How anyone in their right mind, with any semblance of a conscience,(which might be describing Palin) could condone this aerial savagery as "ethical" is beyond the realm of my comprehension.

I also wonder how many who may already be aware of this inhumane practice and for some God-awful reason have no problem with it, are not aware, however, that she rewards these alleged "hunters" if they present the severed forelegs of the poor defenseless creatures, who are run to the ground, harassed by small planes and then repeatedly shot in their backs till they drop from exhaustion.

A minimum of $20 would be very helpful. $40 even better. I made my $40 via their 800# just this afternoon. I wish it could have been more. You'll find their plea and instructions as to how you can help here at DEFENDERS OF WILDLIFE AD CONTRIBUTIONS

Underage Children Slaving In Meat Packing Plant

Apparently, all was not kosher at this large-scale kosher meat packing plant/slaughterhouse. Agriprocessors, a huge kosher meat packing/slaughterhouse in Iowa, has been indicted for employing underage workers in their plant. Children younger than 16 were charged with operating heavy duty machinery, saws, and various other dangerous equipment utilized in the slaughtering process.

The meat packing corporations across the country have finally been the focus of investigations and charges for unsafe, hazardous and public endangerment. Now, add illegal hiring practices of minors. Of course, the inhumane treatment of the animals to be slaughtered always manages to slip lower and lower down the list of priorities for investigators.

This raid on Agriprocessors is one of the largest in the meat industry's history for employing either illegal aliens and/or underage children. Working conditions were not only hazardous, but overall salaries for all employees (including no pay for overtime), was deplorable. Remember, these children were responsible for safe handling and processing of meat to the meat-eating public. Children. It's bad enough most of these slaughterhouses are using downed, ill animals, overworking illegal alien employees and paying by the pound - so the more and faster they kill and process, the more they're paid - but having children working at that breakneck speed doesn't require rocket science to calculate there's more than an even chance tainted meat reaches the supermarket shelves on a regular basis. Most of which goes unreported.

It's only when enough people become significantly ill and/or die, and a connection can be made between, is the meat packer circumspect. By then, for those poor unfortunates, it's a bit too late. Which also goes to point a guilty finger at the sham that is supposed to be regular quality-controlled inspections by the USDA. Agriprocessors was just one that was caught. This time.

I know it doesn't help the animals or the children, but this is yet another reason I'm glad I'm a vegetarian.

The Depths People Will Go For Vanity Lawns

I've already shared my disdain for the American obsession with lawn perfection. I have infinite disdain for the use and overuse of chemicals at all cost (literally, morally, ethically and healthfully) to begin with. But when they're used to maintain that synthetic patch of blue green supposedly to impress neighbors, that only impresses me that these lawn-lusters care more about those blades of grass than the health of their family, pets and whether they're polluting their neighbor's ground water, their environment and destroying all beneficial organisms who have the misfortune of dwelling within your property line.

But now the superficiality which drives the misplaced priorities of so many ill-informed or voluntarily-deaf-on-the-subject homeowners has gone even deeper. Like hundreds or even thousands of feet deeper. Tapping into aquifers and underground streams, crashing through increasingly fragile bedrock in droves, to dig deeper wells. No. Not for drinking water. Not for human sustainability. But to water their lawns and keep their petunias and little-green-meatball-shaped landscape plants irrigated.

According to THIS ARTICLE in The Wall Street Journal, affluent McMansioners in the Middle Atlantic states are using their chump change (which can amount to 1/3 of some people's annual salaries) to dig incredibly deep private wells for private use solely to water their manicured acres and circumvent drought restrictions placed upon use of municipal water for such petty purposes. Just because you may have rights to that water under your property, doesn't mean you have the moral or ethical right to squander a precious natural resource (especially in times of drought) to maintain a few little green meatball-foundation plants, a pot of petunias or a lawn, which will just go dormant and bounce back when some rains and cooler weather return.

The fact that the continued practice of tapping into these aquifers may destroy the bedrock and surrounding ground structure; the fact that this could impact water supplies of those less well off and dependent on more shallow wells; the fact that even municipalities ultimately depend on underground water supplies; the fact that imposition of drought restrictions are increasing as more and more parts of this nation become parched; and the fact that using a precious, natural resource necessary for human viability for such (pardon the pun) 'shallow', fatuous purposes is beyond frivolous. It's shameful. In a world where water will also become as scarce and coveted as oil, it's shameful and provides yet another reasons for foreign nations to hate us.

The rich get richer and greener lawns, too. As if the later matters.

GOP VP Nomineee Or "How To Pander To Women"

When I heard the news the other afternoon announcing who McCain's 'camp' chose for his veep candidate (as I doubt it was McCain himself since he only met the woman once, and I doubt they exchange Christmas cards or anything), I nearly spit out my second cup of coffee. Now you have to understand just how important my second daily intake of caffeine is to me. So losing part of it on the kitchen table had to be elicited by some pretty heavy shit.

Rather than stomp my feet and rant and rave (which I did later), I tried to imagine the conversation that went on in the now smoke-free backrooms of McCain HQ:

"This Obama's got charisma up the wazoo, John. You've got nothing. We need to deal another hand. A whole new hand with a wild card. A gender card! Yeah, that's it, a gender card."

"We've got a pantyhose-load of disillusioned Hillary supporters about to jump the Democratic ship and are swimming toward the Red Boat in protest. So it's obvious they don't give a rat's ass about Republican policy. It's apparent they're willing to whore their Democratic principles in favor of "The Sisterhood". They've made it quite plain to the rest of the voting public that it isn't - and never was - about the issues or platform. To them it's all about shattering that damned glass ceiling of theirs. So.....let's give them a substitute to kick who can kick her spike heels through that glass roof. Just take Hillary's head off the token woman's body and plunk Palin's on there. Shoot. They'll never know the difference! We're golden, old man. After all...they're just women."

In short, the decision to pick this unknown, oil-whore from Alaska to be the person waiting in the wings should this old man kick the bucket while in office - if he's elected that is - is nothing short of pandering to the entire female population of this country and specifically, to the Hillary supporters. Are these women so blinded by the fact that their candidate is out of the Big Picture, they've given the 'talking heads',political hacks and GOP-party poopers all indications that their votes are up for grabs by anyone with a vagina?

That possible scenario would crystallize the condescending disdain many Republican pundits & "good Ole Boys" hold for the female voters specifically. If, in fact, the Hillary Clinton supporters do hitch up their skirts and abandon their mentor's party for Old Man McCain's same-o same-o republican politics of the past 8 lo-o-o-ong years to make kissy face with Palin, then it makes me sick and ashamed of my gender.

WOMEN FOR HILLARY! She lost! Get over it! Get on with the principles and issues she purported to support. Continue what she started, which wasn't a single-minded, feminist (of which I've been one for over 30 years - a feminist, not single minded that is) issue of 'getting a woman in the white house' at all costs. She advocated a woman in the white house (if not her) not just because it would be a female, but because it would be someone capable and the best candidate. Damn. I want to see a women in that Oval Office before I leave this mortal coil. You bet your vote I do. But not on pandering or "quota" terms.

This smoke and make-up mirror switcheroo of McCain is only aiming to get a pair of heels in the Veep's seat. Who's wearing them is irrelevant. if you look at her credentials, that patently obvious. Are disillusioned ,female-Hillary-supporters that desperate for the Republican's crumbs? Wake up, women! Smell the caffe latté being served up to serve up to you with those crumbs. (Make that "serve down to you".) See this condescension for what it is: a slap in the face, an "atta girl", a pinch in the butt and a rub up against you in the subway by these slithery, mealy-mouthed, lying bastards who couldn't give a rat's ass about that Glass Ceiling. Except if they could stand under it and look up your skirt.

Open your eyes! If you believed in the issues - especially those pertaining to women - that Mrs. Clinton put forth, then keep supporting those issues even if you can no longer support the former candidate. Remember, Sarah Palin - if you do your research - holds the diametric opposite of your former candidate's stand on most issues that are a priority to you..as women and as citizens. Ask yourself: Would she want you to vote for McCain simply because he's now got a woman on his ticket? Even though I didn't personally support her, I seriously doubt she would be that bitter - and downright petty or ignorant - to bite her political nose to spite her face, so to speak? Are you all 12 or something? It's your country, God dammit! It's our future. It's not a high school prom queen election.

***September 3rd Addendum to this post: I'd like to kiss the sneakers that he wears, of Jon Stewart for jumping on this with the sarcastic, yet truthful ferocity that he and his writers did last Friday night when this was announced. The piece, as "reported", by one of his on-air "reporters", Samantha Bee, was priceless, accurate to a painful fault and to give it the highest praise I can...I couldn't have written it any better myself. :)

Wally World Satire Or Truth?

I'm sure there's a lot of formerly unemployed citizens who have only been able to find employment at WalMart and rely on Wally's paycheck(?). I'm even more certain there are a lot of unemployed citizens who are unemployed BECAUSE of Walmart.

See THE BIG BOX MART VIDEO

Feds Overturn Still-President Bush's EPA Emission Control

On Tuesday, DC Circuit Court overturned restrictive policies of the EPA and the Still-Bush Administration's Clean Air Act which prevented local and state authorities from determining their own individual emission control standards for their specific locales and informing their citizenry of abusers. The American Petroleum Institute and Exxon along w/the EPA were amongst the most outstanding of those who opposed this decision. Whut a serprize!

States were seeking to formulate their own, individual higher criteria for polluting emissions than the limited, watered-down, rolled-back criteria previously mandated by the EPA and Still-President Bush.

Aw, gee, another hole blown in the ozone filled-head of Still-President Bush and his traveling environmental circus known as the alleged Agency for the Protection of our Environment as he continues till the bitter end to nuzzle Big Oil Butt.

Wait! Is that the sound of sad violins weeping in the oval office? Awwwww, gee.

Organic Hocus Pocus

Faced with alarming outcries and discoveries of tampered, illegally grown or processed and dubious "organic" products, the USDA is instituting the first steps in addressing this situation by disallowing organic approval of a number of consumer goods and additives desirous to sport the USDA/ORGANIC APPROVED seal.

China, perhaps the most recently prominent in the field of oversights and abuse of safety and purity standards in exports, poses a particularly difficult organic nut to crack since they do not allow foreign (aka: American or country of export) regional inspectors into their country to....inspect. The Catch-22 is that in order for the U.S. and other importers to assign (in this instance) organic approval, inspection of facilities, farms, factories, etc. are mandatory. A viscous cycle of uncertainty and irresponsibility.

Hopefully, this action is a step in the right direction for the woefully under-staffed and under-financed USDA. Hopefully, they're making a more concerted effort to enforce organic standards. Hopefully, this will also enable better protection of consumer's health, welfare and safety. Hopefully, the money provided by we consumers to support and fund this administration will be better spent, notwithstanding countries like China's inspection impediments. Hopefully, this indicates that the USDA is finally asking the questions echoed by American citizens especially within these past two years: How organic is organic? Are we safe?

If One Doesn't Work, Try Two, Or Three, Or...

On my "lawn kick" again. Maybe it's because 'lawn season' is in full swing. Or spiral. Downward spiral if you're a chemi-synthet-o-phile about your pwecious widdle gwass plants. Yeeuch!

I can't seem to get through a garden column, garden blog, garden forum, nursery, garden lecture....wherever gardens and all-things-horticultural are being discussed or written about, without the ubiquitous Lawn Possessed Person rising to complain about their browned out, burned out, depressingly bare-spotted and generally sickly patch of what used to be "green".

"I don't know what's the problem". they'll moan through toxic tears. " I watered every day. I fed it fifteen-gazillion times. I gave it half a bazillion treatments of fungicide/herbicide/pesticide/anycide and everycide. I applied every known Scotts et. al. lawn killer (er...lawn treament) put out by their little lab-coated snuffers of all things living in the grounds around our homes. And then I applied some more."

That's pretty much (with a little poetic license) what I'll hear or read. They water every day, too. Every day. You mean the way I see my neighbor's sprinklers ratchet on for 1/2 hour each and every morning. Rain or shine. Or the way I see oscillating sprinklers going for 30 minutes around noon or mid afternoon? Can anyone say: "Not watering long enough and yet, watering too often? " And is anyone familiar with the term: Evaporation? Gaack.

Adding insult to injury, these same overusers and abusers of synthetic fertilizers and chemicals, don't even know how to spell what they're using. I read this just this evening. A guy grabbed a bag of SevEn (that'd be SevIn folks) instead of Weed-O-No-More or Be Gone or some such other defoliant. These people can't spell what they 're using and can't differentiate one bag of poison from another. Ignorance is bliss? Ignorance is running rampant on what's left of America's lawns. Ignorance is wildly careening down the aisles past the foul, acrid stench of - primarily - Scotts chemical buffet at the nearest Big Box stores. And these people never stop to think their lawns are living things. Or at least they're trying to be. They're living things crying out to "Leave Me The Hell Alone!!! Back off from all that crap your dousing me with and give me a freaking chance to breathe and get some alive, beneficial organisms back in me to at least put me on life support before you come along with another bag of Kill-Em-Off". Geesh.

I don't think I'd want to have dinner at the home of one of these synthetic/chemical mental midgets. Boxes of rat poison could easily be mistaken for Sweet N'Low. Then again...isn't Sweet N'Low rat poison?

Lawns And The Men Who Love Them

I am more than ever convinced that the quest for the almighty perfect lawn is predominantly a male domain. Oh, I'm sure there are many females as enamored of their nice blue-green, totally-weed-free, chemically-saturated lawns. But after inculcating myself into the chemical-laden vortex of Lawndom at a major [Scotts] lawn [Scotts] chemical [Scotts] forum, I was astounded at the inordinate number of males extolling the virtues of chemically-enhanced lawns and slavishly avowing their whore-ish devotion to their chemical pimps [Scotts]. ("They poison me, man, but I know they really love me"). I'm certain that if physically possible, they would gladly have sexual relations with their sod, which might explain some of those 'gopher holes' one often sees in even in their perfect, synthetically-enhanced lawns. Hmmmm? Could be those stains in the front yard really aren't from the dog?

As high school boys compare genitalia or boorishly boast falsehoods of conquered girls, so too does that verbose, chest thumping accompany many into adulthood where comparisons of lawns and boorish boasting of weedless, bugless, and (thanks to chemicals) - lifeless - lawns still persists. After all, what respectable earthworm could live with all that accumulated salt from four-times-a-year Scotts weed, feed & bleed toxic concoctions?

The fact is that size never really matters since it's not how big your lawn, but what you do with it. That huge, perfect grass carpet, if attained with synthetic fertilizers, chemical herbicides and pesticides, is not as impressive as that slightly-dandelion-dotted, naturally-green hued grass maintained by nothing more than conscientious mowing, irrigation left to Mother Nature, compost additions or twice-yearly applications of corn gluten meal for weed control and a healthy green color. Any person - male or female - who would skew their priorities so drastically by putting the health and safety of their family and pets at risk for the sole sake of their gazillion little grass plants, is in a word: A dope. Well. Two words.

To suggest, however, that these lawn jockeys consider alternative lawn care practices, or God forbid ratchet back their instant gratification-perfectionist expectations, is tantamount to spiting on the American flag. (An analogy to which they allude quite often as in: "It's American to want a perfect lawn!") In this day and age of all manner of horrors, exploitations and terrorism, I can think of a great many other things that a true American might want, And a perfect lawn isn't one of them. Or at least, it shouldn't be.

'Talk to the hand' is an attitude I've encountered before. It's hard to penetrate a wall of thick,synthetic-mindsets. Even amongst organic gardeners, there are stoic differences of opinion and approach. But most are at least willing to listen or read or research. Why, we even occasionally delve into the dens of ChemicalLand and keep our compost-tinged ears open to chemical drivel from Scotts or Monsanto junkies if for no other reason than to remain updated on The Darkside. It helps enable a cogent, viable argument if you know what "the other side" is thinking when some macho lawn dude pontificates his chemical mantra.

Perfection is in the eye of the beholder; as are priorities, and 'means' do not always justify the end. Sadly, even if the ability to comprehend alternatives is there amongst the Scott's groupies, the willingness to even consider such alternatives was long ago eradicated by copious applications of RoundUp**.

**RoundUp: A non-selective herbicide apparently capable of wiping out brain cells and common sense as well as weeds and several other once functioning, living organisms.**

USDA Ceases Researching & Reporting On Pesticides & Herbicides

Been a long time since I made an entry here, so much to say and always too little time. So I thought I kick this blog back into gear with a quote from the former Republican poster boy, Charleton "You'll have to pry this gun out of my cold, dead hands" Heston. as he pounded the beach near Lady Liberty's crowned head jutting out from the sand dune: "They've finally gone and done it!" Read all about it:HERE

Our beloved administration in its continuing environmentally-sound wisdom (Huh?) has gone and eviscerated the USDA's National Agricultural Statistics Service (NASS), which is responsible for researching, reporting and compiling annual data on various pesticides and herbicides used in farm production. The absence of that data leaves the barn door wide open for MegaMonsanto to have (no pun) a field day w/any new toxic introductions which will wind up in our systems, our air, our earth, our water and eventually, trickle down those products for use in chemically-inclined backyard gardens.

Many groups like Greenpeace, National Research Defense Council (NRDC), the Organic Center and the WWF as well as big-buck corps like Del Monte Foods, the American Soybean Association and - yes - even Syngenta Crop Protection have signed letters to the administration pleading with them to reconsider. The irony in corps like Syngenta signing the letter is this: With no one watching the hen house of pesticides & herbicide possible toxicity, that leaves them [Syngenta, et al] open to criticism and claims by anti-chem venues which Syngenta, et al can't refute by citing stats from the NASS. Get it?

Oddly, one name was glaringly missing from the signatories on that letter: Monsanto, and it typifies to me their: I-don't-give-a-$hit attitude. "Stats? Reports? Research? Claims? Complaints? Feh. Who cares? We'll do whatever the hell we want, spray whatever the hell we want and kill whatever and whoever we want. So there!"

Anyway, Monsanto aside (which isn't easy to do or say), the fact that there will be no official research gathering and reporting on any new pesticide or herbicide out of the chemical labs and onto our crops is to say the least, rather frightening. It's the cherry on the chemical and environmental cake that has been baked, served and shoved down our throats for the last 8 years.

I can't wait to throw up in November.